Archive for the ‘Ultimate weirdness’ category

Looking beyond the stars

November 3, 2008

Inspired my different people’s bucket lists and after having watched that beautiful movie myself, I’ve decided to create my own list!

*Fly a bright colored kite that has my face painted on it

*Sing in front of a HUGE audience and hear the applause

*Own an orchard

*Buy a giant stuffed polar bear

* Ride on an albatross

*Run on the sea shore with my arms wide open, at dawn

*Visit New Zealand

*Go sky diving

*Whistle, without it sounding like a pressure- cooker

*Prove to the world that I can be what I aspire to be

*Play tennis with Sania Mirza and win  😀

* Meet Rahul Dravid and go for a piggy back ride!! 😉

* To be in the cockpit of a jet plane

*Meet an Edward Cullen  😛

* Kick the lab ass’ backside

* Own two horses… One pitch black and the other brown their names being Onyx and Garnet

* Learn how to play basket ball and be good at it!

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Experiment of life

August 29, 2008

Objective:
To cross the bottomless pit that leads straight to Hell.

Apparatus:
A single swinging rope hanging from an unknown part of the sky.

Theory:
At the bottom of the bottomless pit  😀  lies all manner of pain and ugliness. On the other side lies the closest thing one can find to happiness.

Note:For true happiness, one must give up one’s material possessions and live the life of a Buddhist monk with a shaved head, dressed in a saffron rag in a mud hut bang in the middle of the Siachen glacier.

Procedure:
1. Pray a little before you begin.
2. Stand 10 feet from the ledge of the bottomless pit.
3. Wait for the swinging rope to come as possible to the edge of the abyss.
4. Take a running leap and grab hold of the oscillating rope just as it begins to swing back to wherever the hell it came from.
5. Ride it safely to the other side.

Result:
Happiness and satisfaction…or the closest one can get to it without actually giving up one’s Ferrari (see theory).

Precautions:
1. Time your leap such that you don’t drop into the abyss thereby sentencing yourself to burn for all eternity.
2. Do nothing to stimulate the sweat glands during the duration of the journey.
3. Do NOT look down or to the northeast.

Note: To the northeast lies the entire cast of Bay watch Hawaii.

Sources of Error:
1. One may make the mistake of reading this experiment.

Random musings

June 28, 2008

Why are ‘apart’ments stuck together?

Who teaches spiders which leg to put forward first, when they start walking?

Why is inspiration momentary, while depression is more permanent?

Is it ok to kill a mockingbird if you realize that it is a crow in disguise?

The Paper Princess

April 12, 2008

Once upon a time, there was the Paper King.

He had a sheaf of daughters, all very pretty and white. He had so many of them that he just named them One, Two, Three, and so on. His favourite was the youngest, whom he called Theend.

One day, their old yellowed and crinkled aunt took the Paper King to task.

“Aren’t you going to get your daughters married? It’s about time. I can see the first one growing almost as yellow and crinkly as me! Do something before it’s too late!”

The Paper King was upset that his nap was disrupted so rudely – his back hurt all the time and he could barely stand straight by himself. However, he did see the point his sister was trying to make. He sent out all the pages to announce the search for suitable grooms.

The first groom to arrive was the Paintbrush. He was very proud of his thick hair, and his vibrant colours.

“Call me the Camel”, he said, preening vainly.

Princess One fell head over heels in love with him.

“Oooh! I love the way his hair tickles me all over!” she cooed.

The Paintbrush insisted that he give her a makeover, and dressed her in his family colours before the wedding. Princess One made no protest that she had to change so completely to marry him.

The second groom to arrive was Crayola the Crayon.

He was a flaky chap – on first sight, he appeared very sharp and handsome, but as you got to know him, you realized he was quite blunt and boring. His behaviour was rather patchy, but Princess Two was completely taken by him.

“Ooooh! I love the way he rubs me all over!” she cooed.

The Crayon too lost no time in given Princess Two a complete makeover, but she did not protest a bit.

The next to arrive was Prince Parker the Pen. He was very smartly dressed in a blue and silver armor, and had a very sharp nose. Princess Three was completely bowled over by him.

“Ooooh! I love the way he teases me all over!” she cooed.

Prince Parker then insisted that Princess Three change according to his whims, and she did not protest.

Theend watched all her sisters getting married thus, changing so drastically that they no longer remained what they were earlier.

“What about you, my child?”, the Paper King asked her fondly.

“My time has not yet come, Papa”, she replied cheerfully.

She waited by her window everyday, seeking the one she would marry.

Finally, the Pencil, came along. He was a brave and cheerful fellow, who soldiered on inspite of having to carry a burden as heavy as lead. He was dressed in red and black, and went by the name of common name of Nataraj.

“Papa, this is the one I wish to marry!” Theend declared.

“Him?” The Paper King was taken aback.

“But why, you could have anyone you pleased?

”“Papa, I love him because he will let me be myself!”

The Paper King had no choice but to consent.

Theend and Nataraj were married and they lived to a ripe old age, till they both disintegrated.

The Tag

March 13, 2008

People have asked me to do this ‘about me’ tag….

So here goes!!

Ten things you wish you could say to people right now (don’t take names)

1. I miss you, I wish you were here with me!!

2. Please leave me alone, I can do things by myself…

3. I do get serious when it really does matter.

4. What are you saying? I do not watch T.V or use the computer for more than half an hour a day!!

5. Don’t I deserve a chance to prove myself?

6. Hey, things will become okay!!

7. Don’t breathe down my neck

8. I love you

9. Lets go out for an ice-cream

10. Why dont I get a break from doing physics, chem or math??

Nine things about yourself

1. I am a very sensitive person, but on the outlook I act bonkers!!

2. I love music, books and tennis and I consider them an integral part of my life

3. I can get into a temper tantrum over the smallest of things to the annoyance of pepole around me. ( u’d have to know me well to identify my mood swings!!) P

4. I cannot imagine myself to survive even for a day, without someone to talk to!!

5. Chocolates and ice-cream can really get me going

6. I kick, roll and talk in my sleep….

7. I can’t stand people instructing me 24/7

8. I can adjust to anything new, pretty quickly

Eight ways to win your heart

1. Get me a bar of chocolate or an ice-cream

2. Act as a chatter box, to accompany me!!

3. Understand my mood swings

4. Do not nag me and keep telling me what to do

5. Be un-conventional

6. Read and post comments on my blog!! 🙂

7. Be open- minded

8. Be there when I truly need you.

Seven things that cross your mind a lot
1. Going back home to dubai
2. Holidays!!
3. Why are my results always so pathetic?
4. Why does CBSE have to be so hard? (or maybe just Kumarans!!)
5. When I’d be able to ride a bike!!
6. When I’d get to meet Rahul Dravid.. 😛
7. My next visit to Samarthanam.

Six things you wish you never did
1. Taken grade 11 for granted and fared miserably!! 😦
2. Yelled at people close to me for no fault of theirs.
3. Gotten all worked up nd cried over trivial issue, all to myself…
4. Let various opportunities, just go by!!
5. Done anything to let my parents down.
6. Been naive and let people take advantage of me!!

Five Turn offs
1. Bitching about people behind their backs
2. People not looking at me when being talked to
3. Show- off’s
4. Pessimissim
5. People trying to be something they aren’t!!

Four turn on’s
1. People being frank
2. Being open-minded
3. People full of energy,always ready for something
4. Wit

Three things you want to do before you die
1. Prove that I am am worth a lot!!
2. Organise a programme exclusively for children with special needs to display their talents!!
3. Bungee jumping

Two smileys that describe you
:D, 😛
One confession
I love dancing to myself!! 😛

I tag Kadambari, Priya, Aditi, Poorna, Abhishek…
Really, its a lot of fun!! 🙂

Duping Murphy

January 26, 2008

Disclaimer: None of what is about to follow is scientific. I am aware that Physics, if given eyes to read this, and hands to wield a hammer with, will read this and beat me to pulp!!!

I think there’s a murphy’s law that goes something like “only when you absolutely give up on something, do you get it”

Ever lost a key ? You look everywhere, backtrack everything you did from when you last remember seeing it, and then go to all those places and search for it and then never find it. Then you kinda give up. You take the duplicate (thank god you found that one) and begin using it rather remorsefully. You aren’t able to really stop searching though. Suddenly, maybe in the middle of the night, you go to the fridge to drink some water and start searching in the fridge (just in case you know ? you’ve searched in all the right places and didn’t find it. maybe you oughtta search in the oddest of places) but to no avail. A couple of days go by. Everytime you use the duplicate you feel slightly incomplete. You miss the old key. You liked the old key. When you had the old key, you always knew that if you lost it, you’ll be able to use the duplicate. But now you panic a tad about making a duplicate of the duplicate. You pray that you find the key

Few days later you’re closer to giving up. You’ve given up trying to find it. You’ve given up missing it. You’ve even given up being extra careful with the duplicate and decide the time has come for the final burial, symbolized by the making of the triplicate. The key maker asks you to come back in the afternoon. You say ok. Just as you’re leaving home, you find the original-staring at you as though it was always there, staring at you as though all the world’s a blind spot to you.

I’ve seen this happen with me so many times (yes -I am in the habit of losing things and often(the definition of often being as vague as it can be) finding them too). But it’s always always only once you’ve truly given up.

In the last one week, by virtue of doing absolutely nothing about it, I’ve found a shirt, a very important marks card, some more clothes that I thought I’d seen the last of, old memories and so on and so forth.

The trick to getting something or finding something is to do nothing about it. Nothing. The only requirement is that you set the balls in motion. As in, i suppose it’s important that you realize that you’ve lost something, or haven’t got something yet and generally let it be known- a plea into the air. You have to let it be known to Murphy’s random quark cluster (or any fancy word) that they’re supposed to re-aggregate into a key, or a yacht, or a dog or whatever it is you’ve lost. And then, and I think this particular step is important, you have to let go. Forget about it. Not pretend to have forgotten about it. No- that won’t work. Murphy’s quarks can sense that you don’t trust them. And you see, that, i think is perceived as terribly insulting behaviour. And they will of course refuse to acquiesce to your wishes. Maybe they draw energy from your trust. Maybe they require you to be their moral support. I don’t know. But the point is, you have to let go, and decide that your key is doomed for, that your yacht is being eaten by crazy beings deep under and that there’s an alien with ten hands somewhere who doesn’t quite know how to fit into your two handed shirt, but will choose to keep it as proof of alternative forms of intelligence. You simply have to let go.

And then, the quarks will go about their business, and voila!!!, you’ve found whatever it is you’ve lost.

I know this works for small things. But I wonder about big things. Is it possible to get something that I want really really badly, if I really, truly sit and do nothing about it ? It throws the whole “as you sow, so you reap” philosophy into debris. But if it is true, I wonder if i’ll ever be courageous enough to try it.

There are things in this world that just need to happen. It isn’t about your potential or how much you’ve worked for it or how much you deserve it. There are things that happen that have no specific relation to the input. They’re born from nothing, and they’re beautiful and exciting and fulfilling and perfect. There’s nothing more you’ll need and nothing more you’ll want, and there will be no point in remembering a time when you didn’t have it, or worrying about a time when you won’t have it. for the time they last ( a few seconds to eternity), they define perfection. And yet, i wonder, if i can be lucky enough to get it by simply not bothering about it.

Dare i try ?
Sadly, the answer is- no.
I don’t!

But until then, i’m quite content with knowing that i’ll never lose what i already have.

Hands

December 24, 2007

There’s all these things hanging and jutting out in a lotta weird ways from our bodies (or from the core of our bodies ?) and i’m wondering why i haven’t put a lot of them to better use.
My hands especially- i’ve never really used them for much. apart from the eating, cleaning, moving them while talking motions, haven’t used them for anything.
There’s so much one can do with them- artily craftily speaking… Wonder why i haven’t,
and there’s this circular logic thing that i’ve run into-the dexterity and co-ordination comes from having neurons in your brain properly wired, and neural networks set at the right threshold impulse levels and such.
So now that i wanna do all these things with my hands, i wonder if i’ll be able to… i mean, will my brain listen to me ? probably not ?so is there any point even bothering to do it ? i dunno. i really dunno.
but if i never try, i will never know.but if i already know, is there any point in trying ?i mean, sure it’s the journey that counts and not the destination. but… i mean, honestly.

But the point still remains, if i never try, i will never know.
will i ever try ?
apart from just sitting and wondering what “if”.i hope i do.i really hope i do.miracles happen right ?
and a badly made clay pot ain’t a miracle is it ?
no siree…
i’m rambling away in the hope that i will convince myself to do something about it.
ah nvm…
i shall meet this former self a coupla weeks/months/years from now… and let’s see if that latter self has done something about.which brings me into a whole different realm about time travel and stuff…
that’s reserved for another sunny day…